DEAR MAY

May and John

In life, if we are really lucky, sometimes we meet people who are truly spectacular. They have that extra little piece of magic that isn’t easy to explain to others but you know it is there. My grandparents May and John had that magic with almost everyone they came into contact with and I’m so grateful to be a part of it all. Here is their story.

My grandparents met in the 50’s at a well known dance hall in Glasgow called ‘The Barrowland Ballroom’. The story my Pop would tell us all is:
“I clocked eyes with an absolute beauty who was standing across the dance floor amongst her small group of friends. After one hundred conversations in my head and tormenting teasing from my friends I decided to stand up, be brave and walk the nerve wracking plank they call “the dance floor” to her. When I arrived, the beautiful girl had her back to me and so I lifted my hand to tap her on the shoulder however… as my hand took the long sweaty dive to meet her, she moved out of the way and my finger hit a different girl! Nightmare! Too embarrassed to say that it was a mistake, I asked the new girl if she would like to dance and the rest is history.”
Knowing how much of a jokester my Pop was I doubt this story is accurate, and my Nana was in fact the correct shoulder all along, however it did bring a laugh to everyone’s face (but my Nana’s) every time he told it. 

My grandparents came from two stories - one being a military child who loved his mother and sister and the other being the eldest catholic child of many. Together they went on to create a life full of faith, culture, hard work, adventure and family. As you will see from their wedding photograph they were married young. However, back in those days, religion was still a large contributing factor when meeting potential suitors so in order to gain my Great Grandfather's permission my Pop had to convert to Catholicism. So… that he did by sweet talking the priest at my Nana’s local catholic church to baptise him. Turns out, they both liked boxing and so him and the priest ‘hit’ it off! Signed, sealed, delivered - I’m yours May. 

Some years after marriage my grandparents went on to live in Jamaica, have four children and thirteen grandchildren. Our lives growing up as their grandchildren was full of stories from Jamaica, dancing around tables while my Nana sang Caribbean songs and, most importantly, eating jerk chicken and plantain off of our freezing Scottish BBQ. Food was and always will be a big thing in our family as it brings us together. I like to think that the question ‘what is your favourite meal?’ takes on a whole new meaning when the company is just as good as the food.

When my Pop first set off to Jamaica, my Nana chose to stay at home with her children until life out in the Caribbean and Scotland was more foundationally sound. During this time they would write to one another via air mail in order to stay connected since the luxury of whatsapp wasn’t at their fingertips. One letter in particular stands out as it is very much a love letter written by my Pop to my Nana hence the title of this blog post: ‘Dear May’. If only it were Dear John right! Though I think there would be copyright issues there… Without infringing on their intimacy and privacy I would like to share a small part of this letter with you all that reveals just how special my Nana was to my Pop and just how impactful love letters can truly be.

“Dear May,

Please keep this letter because I want to read it from time to time to remind myself how much I really love you. I know that when you come out we’ll have our usual arguments, but, no matter what I ever say when we are arguing you can show me this letter and believe me, I know that I just wouldn’t live without you”.

Sometime after this letter my Nana took the leap and went out with my Uncle and Aunt to live a beautiful life, with her love, in Jamaica where they went on to have another two children - one being my Mum. No doubt, like all couples, arguments were had but what is truly special is that she accepted my Pop’s request and held onto the letter forever. It is the promises we keep that allow us to continue to be vulnerable in the truths we tell as trust in love is everything. 

On the cusp of their 50th wedding anniversary my Pop sadly passed away and it was one of the hardest losses I personally have grieved. He was the head of our family and a presence that is forever missed. My Nana, is still with us ruling the roost! She will forever be our root and I will always be in awe of her eclectic creative mind… that and her ability to move seriously heavy furniture single handedly in order to achieve her vision!

Before my Pop died he would tell us that the best decision he and my Nana made was having a big family. I feel extremely grateful to just be a part of it all as that in itself feels like stardust. Rare and special. If only we could preserve these rare emotions and moments in time in bottles so that we may revisit them throughout our lives and share them with others. I think, for me, this is why photographs, videos, gatherings and pausing to feel grateful during moments is so important as they are a way for people to live on so prominently in our stories everyday. Our time on this earth may be short in physicality however if we continue to tell the stories of the people we love throughout the generations then we shall live on in others forever.

So… hug your loved ones, stop in moments to feel grateful and keep telling your stories.

Thank you Nana and Pop - for everything.

Maria xo